The View from a Drawbridge

Tag: marriage

  • Marriage. Ugh.

    I love my friends. Truly I do. But I must admit that I’m happy to have the excuse of living all the way on the other side of the continent from most of them, because this way I can tactfully avoid weddings. Weddings generally give me migraines, because I can feel the stress and tension…

  • Satisfying Your Man

    Recently a very distant young relative posted this meme on her Facebook page. It made me very sad. Not because I’m pro-Hillary Clinton (which I am), but because of the whole mindset behind this meme. So I asked my relative, “Why was it her responsibility to satisfy him?” All I heard back were some very…

  • Avoidance Practices

    I used to date someone long ago whose mother was… well… weird. And by that I mean really, really odd. Her concept of reality was so skewed that you never knew where she was coming from. Her children used to make fun of her behind her back, which made me extremely uncomfortable, but I tried…

  • Marriage Contracts

    I was listening to Weekend Edition on NPR the other day, and they were discussing the fact that in Israel, a woman cannot get divorced without her husband’s permission. Even a secular woman in that country is bound by this ancient Jewish practice. So if you have a vindictive husband with nothing to lose (the…

  • I Wish I Were a Huxtable

    I am hardly one to describe the perfect marriage. I appear to be terminally single, and heaven knows I’ve never witnessed a perfect marriage outside of television. But if I ever were lucky enough to be in a good marriage, I’d want it to be just like that of Clair and Cliff Huxtable on The…

  • The Luxury of Leisure

    Ah, to have a beautiful sunny day and no plans to fill it with! To read a good book, bask in the sunshine, feel a sea breeze across your face, and play with your dogs. To take a nap in mid-afternoon with only the sound of a distant lawnmower to lull you to sleep. Bliss.…

  • Revenge Porn

    My, my, I’ve led a sheltered life. I hadn’t even heard of revenge porn until this month. For the uninitiated, these are websites predominately directed against women. Men who have been jilted can post the compromising photos they took while still in a relationship, and include detailed stories about their exes, possibly true, possibly outlandish,…

  • A Woman’s Fate is about Location, Location, Location

    Once upon a time I owned my own home, and was actually surviving financially. Not rich. Never that. But I was doing okay. So I started thinking about women who were less fortunate than myself. I’m very aware that the bulk of my good luck in life is based simply on the arbitrary fact that…

  • Sworn Virgins in Albania, Montenegro and Kosovo

    In the isolated areas of Albania, Montenegro and Kosovo, the gender roles have traditionally been extremely restrictive for women. They could not inherit, own land, vote, work outside of the home, choose their own spouses, smoke, drink, wear pants or watches, sing or dance, interact with men, or own businesses. They weren’t even supposed to…

  • Apple Butter

    I once asked my mother why on earth she married my stepfather, a man she never really loved, who caused untold amounts of destruction in our lives and was destined to have a negative impact on me long after his death, and she said, “It seemed like a good idea at the time.” Don’t all…