Affectations

I once knew a guy who spoke with a French accent. The thing is, he was born and raised in Columbus, Ohio. None of his siblings had French accents, nor did his parents.

I also know an American writer who absolutely insists on using British spelling at every opportunity. Colour. Theatre. He also uses antiquated words such as “fortnight”. Honestly, when’s the last time you’ve ever heard anyone say fortnight?

I also have known a few people who refuse to modernize. I worked with a lady, I swear to God, who still has a bouffant hairstyle. People call her “helmet head” behind her back. Another one likes to wear cat glasses and pillbox hats.

And then there are those who like to be on the cutting edge. Too far on the cutting edge. They tended to wear one glove when Michael Jackson did, and had Flock of Seagulls hair.

And frankly, senior citizens wearing short shorts or miniskirts…that’s just a little bit sad.

I’m all for individuality. Believe me, I am. And I myself have a tendency to zig when I should zag every now and then. It’s great fun to push the boundaries and flout convention. But when you stubbornly cling to things waaaay past their expiration date, or go where no sane person will, that’s not trendy. That’s not stylish. It’s pathetic.

I have two theories about people like this. Either they are so out of touch with reality, so ignorant of all social cues, that they just don’t know any better, and/or they have such low self-esteem that they think they have to go to such lengths to be accepted.

Prithee, get with the programme.

Image Credit: http://www.demotivationalposters.org