Foreign Spam

I just love it when I get comment spammed by someone whose first language clearly isn’t English. Some of the most insane gibberish comes through, and I usually laugh right before I relegate it to the trash bin. Yesterday I got this one: “This is a technique that is actually enabling bag-pros to rise.” What…

I just love it when I get comment spammed by someone whose first language clearly isn’t English. Some of the most insane gibberish comes through, and I usually laugh right before I relegate it to the trash bin. Yesterday I got this one: “This is a technique that is actually enabling bag-pros to rise.”

What the hell is a bag-pro and why does it need to rise? It almost sounds like a strange form of ugly low-end prostitution. The frustrating thing is I can’t ask, because a) they wouldn’t understand me, and b) it would only encourage more spam. And goodness knows I won’t click on the attached link. Therein lies a primordial ooze of computer viruses. So I sort of look at these things as if they were missives from outer space, smile, and move on.

By the very nature of spam, these strange messages are a plea for you to take action. Buy my product. Visit my website. But when they get so utterly lost in translation, you kind of get the feeling that someone is begging you to do something, but you have no idea what. That can be kind of unsettling. So I try to look at my inaction as a triumph over manipulation. Score one for me! At the same time, I sort of feel sorry for the spammer, because they’re spending their precious time with high hopes for positive results, and I can’t imagine they’re getting them.

These alien messages tend to take me outside of my comfort zone for a split second. But I actually kind of enjoy it when life hands me a rude awakening that my perspective is not the only one. I enjoy being reminded that there are other cultures, other points of view, other desires, and thought processes that are entirely foreign to me. I like these encounters even more when they are brief and deletable.

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[Image credit: lucrativeim.com]

9 responses to “Foreign Spam”

  1. I love my delete button. I think of it as being able to swat a mosquito with a 2×4. I love the power it gives me. Is that wrong?

    1. If it’s wrong, I don’t wanna be right. 🙂 And I feel the same way about the mute button on my remote. I sometimes wish it worked on people.

  2. REMOTELY YOURS

    What is this obsession you have?
    I watch out of the corner of my eye,
    as your hand gently glides along it’s body.
    I shudder as your finger tips seem to know where to touch
    to get the response you desire.

    Nothing I say can get you to release your hold.
    Such love,
    I wish were mine.

    Take me.
    Hold me.
    Push my buttons.

    No! No!
    Not that one.

    Not the mute butt…

    © Copyright 2013

    1. I LOVE this Carole! Well done!

  3. Who cares what language it is, as long as you can get cheap Viagra?

    1. Well, yeah, there is that.

      Woo hoo! Welcome back! I’ve missed you!

      1. me too you too

  4. I get tonnes of spam like these. I delete them all but I just might make a post about it. Hilarious!

    1. Look forward to reading that.

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