A Great Fall

We’re told that Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Well, what was so great about it? I suppose “horrible” or “nasty” or “painful” have too many syllables for the purposes of the rhyme, but still… great?

(And incidentally, one of my frequent readers once pointed out to me that there’s nothing that says Humpty Dumpty was an egg, and yet we all pretty much think of him as one due to a long ago illustrator. I can’t get that out of my head. But as usual, I digress.)

The other day I had a “great” fall. I was at the top of a flight of stairs and my feet actually flew up over my head. I came down with all my weight on the point of my right elbow and felt the jolt the entire length of my spine. I then slid all the way down the stairs and landed in a heap on the landing. (I think they call them landings for good reason.)

I lay there for quite some time. The wind was knocked out of me, and my brain kind of went white for a bit. I’ve only had a few “great” falls in my lifetime, thank goodness, but each time it was like my brain and lungs sort of shut off and had to reboot. I didn’t lose consciousness (I don’t think), but it was like I wasn’t able to process information for a split second, including how to breathe. Very disconcerting.

And then when everything came back on line, so to speak, I was afraid to move, because if I had broken anything, this would be the last few precious moments I could savor as someone who wasn’t broken, if that makes any sense. And I also had this irrational fear that I’d get up, look behind me, and see my dead body lying there. And then what?

Times like these it really sucks to live alone. Sure, my dogs were at the top of the stairs, looking down at me with great concern. I am, after all, their only meal ticket. But they couldn’t have called 911 no matter how well trained they are. (And they aren’t.)

I figured I’d really be hurting the next day, so once I determined that nothing was broken I took a hot bath and an aspirin and went to bed. I had totally forgotten why I was going down the stairs in the first place. Fortunately everything was fine when I woke up, except my elbow. I think I bruised the bone. It only hurts when I lean on it, which I do a lot more often than I ever realized.

So I guess the fall was great after all, in terms of the fact that I’m still alive. Yay me!

[Image credit: shrek.wikia.com]

Author: The View from a Drawbridge

I have been a bridgetender since 2001, and gives me plenty of time to think and observe the world. View all posts by The View from a Drawbridge