The View from a Drawbridge

The new guy who plays Col. Sanders in the KFC commercials gives me the willies. I don’t know what the difference is between him and the original, but there most definitely is one. Maybe it’s his oily voice or his fake sounding Southern accent or the slight smirk on his face, but let’s just say I’d never let him babysit my child.

He’s almost as disturbing as the Burger King guy. Who thought THAT would be a good idea? You’d half expect him to show up in a grade B slasher film. If I saw him walking down the street, I’d call the cops.

And I’ve never seen a child interact with the Ronald McDonald clown without crying. And the Jack in the Box guy is rather disturbing, too.

So as more and more info comes out about Jared Fogle, the former spokesperson for Subway Sandwiches, and his predilection for underage girls, I am disgusted, but not particularly surprised.

What is it about fast food spokesmen? Don’t the advertising agencies get consumer feedback anymore before starting campaigns? Don’t they thoroughly vet the actors? Or maybe there’s some strange connection between the creep factor and profits. I don’t quite get it. If anything, it makes me avoid such places.

In that case, I suppose I owe the creepy spokesmen of the world a debt of gratitude. My arteries thank you, as does my waistline. Just please don’t ever knock on my door, asking to borrow a cup of sugar.