What follows are the highlights of an online conversation I had with Tracfone Wireless. For reference, “You” is me, and anything italicized is my inner dialogue. (Because I’d never be quite so rude as to say these things out loud.) Items in bold are a synopsis of things I left out so as not to torture you as much as I was being tortured. Some information has been changed to protect my privacy.
This conversation took well over an hour, and at the end it’s a pure miracle I had any hair left in my head at all, such was my level of frustration.
: Thank you for visiting Tracfone today. How may I help you?
Wendy : Thank you for visiting TracFone Wireless.
Redundant, but okay…
Wendy : Hi Barbara. How may I assist you?
You : Hi Wendy. I have been trying to port my phone number from Tracfone to Verizon for two weeks. They said it should only take two days. Can you tell me what the hold up is?
Wendy : I’m sorry to hear that. Please allow me a moment to look into this.
You : Thank you.
Wendy : You are welcome.
Wendy : I did not find any record about a port out request. Have you contacted the new service provider to investigate the status of your request?
You : Yes. They claim they’ve placed the request twice.
Wendy : I will need to contact our Portability department for assistance. One moment, please.
Wendy : We will have to transfer you to a portability specialist to further assist you with your port request.
Ram : Thank you for choosing TracFone Wireless as your service provider.
Ram : Thank you for visiting TracFone Wireless.
Again, redundant. But again, okay.
Ram : Hi Barbara. Allow me a moment to review your previous chat conversation.
You : Hi Ram. Thank you.
Ram : You’re welcome. One moment, please.
Ram : Are we working on the phone number that ends with 1234.
You : yes
Ram : Alright. Do you have the phone with you?
You : I have both the 1234 phone and the one I want to port it to. Both are with me.
Ram : Okay. Phone is already active.
You : Yes. They gave me a temporary number.
Ram : What is the last four number of the IMEI of the new phone?
You : xxxx
Ram : Thank you. What is your security PIN?
You : yyyy
Ram : That is not what we have here.
You : zzzz maybe? You are talking about for my Verizon phone?
Ram : No. Your security PIN from us.
You : wwww?
Ram : Yes.
You : 🙂
Ram : We don’t have records on the new IMEI number.
You : Do you have a record of any portability request?
Ram : Yes.
(You’ll see below that that’s in direct contradiction to what he’ll say later.)
You : Hmmm. Are the last 4 digits aaaa?
Ram : No.
You : When you asked for my IMEI number originally, were you asking for my TRACFONE IMEI, or the one it should be ported to?
You : My current tracfone IMEI is xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You : I want it ported to qqqqqqqqqqqq.
Ram : Yes.
Ram : I have that.
You : The Main phone on the verizon account ends in tttt, but we do NOT want my number ported to that phone. He wants to keep his number.
Ram : The new phone is this a tracfone as well.
You : The new phone is not a tracfone. Tracfones are incompatible with Verizon, apparently, so I had to buy a new one.
Ram : I see.
Ram : Let me check this one.
Ram : Do you still have this old phone?
I already told you that.
You : yes
Ram : The one that ends with 4321? Where did you get the new phone?
You : From Verizon. And yes, I do have the one ending in 4321 still.
You : I’d like to NOT have it anymore… but I’m waiting for you guys to port.
Ram : Yes.
Ram : That is the reason I was not able to access the new phone.
You : Ah. So what do I have to do?
Ram : Are you leaving us?
WHAT DO YOU THINK I’VE BEEN SAYING THIS ENTIRE FREAKIN’ TIME????
You : Yes
Ram : You are porting out from us.
IS THAT NOT WHAT PORTING OUT MEANS?
You : Yes.
Ram : If that is the case you need to call your new provider what you want.
You : They made their first request to you TWO WEEKS AGO. They repeated their request a week ago.
Ram : We did not received them.
You : I am not sure what the problem is. I just want my phone number ported from my Tracfone to my Verizon phone. I can’t believe how hard this is. Is there any number they can call directly and speak to a human being at Tracfone? Because otherwise they’ll just repeat their fruitless request a third time.
Ram : I am telling you, we did not received a request.
Ram : If that is the case, then yes.
You : So tell me a way they can call directly to someone who can fix this. Please.
Ram : All they need to do is send a port out request.
You : And they have told me they have, twice. So I don’t know where the disconnect is. But if their human could talk to your human, maybe it could be resolved.
Ram : I apologize for any inconvenience you have experienced due to this issue.
You : I know this is not your fault, Ram. I’m not blaming you. But please understand my frustration. Two weeks. Two different stories. And no one talking to anyone directly.
Ram : I don’t see any request from your old provider.
We’ve established that.
Ram : We are working on the phone number that ends with 1234?
For God’s SAKE!!!!!
You : Yes. That’s my old tracfone number. And they would be my NEW provider, not my old one. But if their requests are going to the wrong place, I need a direct number they can call.
You : My verizon temporary number is xxx-xxx-xxxx. That’s the phone I want my 1234 number ported to.
Ram : We can’t open your that temporary number, that is not with us.
I know that.
Ram : Just informed them that I mentioned that we did not received a request.
Ram : Not once.
You : Who did you inform?
Ram : You.
You : Yes, you did. What I am saying is that on THEIR end, THEY think they’ve put in the request twice. Apparently it’s not getting to you. Therefore THEY need a direct phone number to call at Tracfone, so that THEY can call YOU GUYS and get this straightened out. Because clearly they are sending their requests to the wrong place.
Ram : Okay. This is our portability hotline number 18003272077.
Was that so freakin’ hard?
You : Thank you Ram.
Ram : You’re welcome.
Ram : Is there anything else that I can assist you with?
You : That’s quite enough. Thanks.
Ram : You’re welcome.
Ram : Thank you for chatting with TracFone Wireless.
Give me strength.
After that, I spoke again with Verizon.
Then I had a pint of ice cream in one sitting.
The situation wasn’t resolved for another three days, and required 3 more phone conversations.
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