A former coworker once told me that she wasn’t going to tell anyone her retirement date until the last minute because she “wouldn’t give them the satisfaction.”
My first thought was, “therein lies your problem.”
She knew she wasn’t liked. She knew people would be thrilled to see her go. (Heaven knows, I’d be first in line to do a happy dance.) But what she failed to realize is that it was her very instinct to withhold satisfaction from people that caused much of the animosity.
She never acknowledged a job well done. In fact, she would be the first to criticize. She never did a thing to boost morale. In fact, she was the most soul-sucking individual I’ve had the misfortune to know. She never encouraged independent thought or unique ideas. She was the poster child for micromanagement. Not only did she not give satisfaction, but she made our lives a living hell every chance she got.
I’ve never in my life been so happy to see the back of someone.
Of course, every situation is different. Sometimes resentment is justified. But I suggest that if you’re really bitter, and don’t want to give someone the satisfaction, you might want to make sure that you aren’t the apex predator in this little manhunt of yours. If people are horrible and you have no control over that, that’s one thing. But if people are horrible because you yourself are petty and impossible to deal with, that’s another thing entirely.
Decency and respect is a two way street. You have total control over how you drive on that street. Are you making people want to swerve to avoid you? It’s important to drive defensively, but it’s even more important to stay in your lane.