The View from a Drawbridge

The random musings of an autistic bridgetender with entirely too much time on her hands.

Aren’t You Tired of Being Scared?

This whole presidential clusterf**k is making me physically ill.

Can you feel it, America? Everyone, no matter what their political beliefs may be, seems to be in a constant state of fear. The never-ending tension in the air is at an all time high. No good can come from this.

We democrats worry about the end of freedom and democracy as we know it, because there are forces at work to turn this country into a fascist, violent, racist, misogynistic, controlling, Handmaid’s Tale type of state. And as far as I can tell, republicans are afraid that they will be washed out to sea by a wave of rapists and murderers pouring across the borders, hellbent on stealing their jobs at all the slaughter houses and bean fields, which will make it easier for all babies to be slaughtered at birth by government sanctioned medical professionals, and no one will be able to rescue them from this fate because gas will cost 25 dollars a gallon.

I don’t know about you guys, but this whole presidential clusterf**k is making me physically ill. My stomach is in knots, and I feel continually nauseated. The bar is being set so low that we are forced to have to dig to even find it. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t live in a constant state of terror.

I have always been one to stay informed, but it occurs to me that my decision regarding who to vote for (ANYBODY but Trump) is cast in stone. My ability to change the minds of people who are going to vote for Trump is, essentially, nil. As far as I know, I have never changed anyone’s mind about anything in my entire life.

I’d like to think I’m an activist and a change-maker. I really would. But I can’t remember the last time I actually got off my a$$ and protested or did anything that makes any difference whatsoever. Who gets elected is completely out of my control, aside from casting my vote, which I most definitely will do.

What is the point of destroying my sanity and health in the meantime? What I’ve decided to at least try to do is stop listening to the political news. I already know how they make their steaming, putrid pile of political sausage, and I don’t want to eat it anymore.

I know what you’re going to say. That’s what they want me to do. They want me to remain blissfully ignorant so they can move right in and take control without resistance. I hear you. I do. But I don’t think I’m ignorant. In fact, I think I know all too much. Things are already so freakin’ bad that discovering that they’re worse has diminishing returns. I can’t get more fearful for this country’s future than I already am. I have reached my limit.

I will still encourage people to vote, but I can’t let these f**kers control my level of anxiety anymore. I am going to try to remain in a political cone of silence until after the election. I have to. Otherwise this situation could very well kill me.

I have always found it impossible not to speak out when I see injustice. I have always been one of the first people to point out that the emperor has no clothes. Valuing integrity is in the very fiber of my being. So I may not be able to keep this news blackout up for very long. But I have to try.

If you can think of a better alternative for me, I’m open to suggestion. But if not, then let’s talk politics again in 2025. Until then, fingers crossed, passport up to date, and stomach protected. There are plenty of other things to blog about.

The ultimate form of recycling: Buy my book, read it, and then donate it to your local public library or your neighborhood little free library! http://amzn.to/2mlPVh5

11 responses to “Aren’t You Tired of Being Scared?”

  1. Lyn Avatar
    Lyn

    Nexium, meditative breathing and regular doses of comedy,political satire and memes, in beween the negative rhetoric, helps me stave off ulcers which have plagued me since my teens. So far, no new ones since Biden and Harris took over the mission to make America sane again. And now our V.P. will make America laugh again. Ka-M.A.L.A. Try a dart board covered with pictures of the political figures who stress you most (especially faux hillbilly Vance with his cat lady b.s.) while listening to these https://www.youtube.com/shorts/R6sc411Ve5M

    A big dose of hope also helps. Randy said it so well nearly four years ago

    You can poke your head out again because ‘We are not going back’ as long as we support each other and follow Mamala… The mother this country finally realizes it needs.

    Gotta go find me a coconut tree to fall out of for fun.😄

    Reply
    1. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
      The View from a Drawbridge

      I do feel better now that Biden has stepped back. Kamala is much more relatable, and she has a pulse. But still, I’ve decided that I’m going to make every effort to never hear Trump’s voice again. No good ever comes from it. Don’t even get me started on Vance. What a clown. And Randy is my guru. Please don’t land on your head if you insist on falling from the coconut tree. I need you to remain cognitive because you give me such great perspective. Plus, I want you to vote appropriately. 🙂

      Reply
      1. Lyn Avatar
        Lyn

        We all have our breaking points when being traumatized repeatedly. Thought you’d appreciate this comment about losing parts of our humanity if continually exposed to atrocities we feel helpless to stop. Posted on a video of a Jewish German Therapist explaining her beliefs about why Germany supports Israel, this comment, in it’s raw honesty, speaks of my deepest fear… becoming numb to the horrors visited upon the most vulnerable of us, because I can’t bear the weight of their pain. I’m highly empathetic, but lately find myself putting on headphones to block out screams, and sunglasses to darken the glare of reality, so I might avoid a permanent melt down. This mans comment is both a prayer and a promise. I must believe in the strength of my heart to hold the truth gently, no matter how painful, without either breaking.


        @grahamebell4593         2 weeks agoThe dead children don’t affect me like they used to. The images. The videos. They still disturb and horrify, but not like they did in the beginning. Not anywhere close. And, honestly, I hate it. I hate that that part of me has been stolen. As much as I hated having my heart kicked around all day and having nightmares all night, I’d rather have that than this decreased sensitivity. People should not become desensitized to such horrors. People should not become accustomed to decapitated babies and small, mangled bodies. To corpses run over by tanks. To body parts carried in plastic bags by loved ones. These things should jar you. They should rattle you to your core. But they don’t anymore. Not here. I held onto it for as long as I could. It felt like a solemn duty, to hold on to that part of me that still screamed with an appropriate mixture of grief and outrage at the latest tiny shredded body. But desensitization sets in whether you want it to or not. That’s how they create soldiers, after all. I hate that these pricks have amputated that part of me, and I hate that I know it will never grow back. I have been permanently disfigured inside, mutated by atrocities, all the way down here safe in the Melbourne suburbs. And I hate that this is happening all around the world to everyone else who’s kept their gaze fixed on Gaza. All around the world humanity is being mutated. All around the world something sacred is being stolen from the hearts of good people. All around the world people are finding callouses where there used to be tenderness. And I want my tenderness back, god damn it. I want my tenderness back. Give me back the nightmares. Give me back the tears. Give me back the dry retching over the toilet, and the shaking under the blankets. Give me back the collapsing onto the couch and not moving for several hours until my system can recover from what my eyes just saw. I’ll take it. I’ll take it all back again. Just give me back that soft, tender part of myself that has been withered to dust by a live-streamed genocide. I will take good care of it. I will feed it good things. I’ll give it plenty of sunshine, cupping it delicately in my hands by the window. I will take it for walks, and let it rejoice at the children running and playing, with their parts all together and their insides on the inside. Don’t leave me hardened and darkened like a soldier. Give me back that soft, sacred part of myself that weeps at the corpses of children, so I can behold the world gently again.

      2. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
        The View from a Drawbridge

        You know what, though? I have a really positive attitude about one’s ability to recover. (Positive? Me? Yes, for once.) Just as nature quickly takes over when places are abandoned, to the point where you can barely tell that humans were ever there, I believe if humanity does it’s part, that Global Warming will reverse itself more than people predict. And I believe we can get our tenderness back. Kamala has me feeling better already. Keeping Trump out of the White House will feel like pouring water on a wicked witch. And 4 years from now he’ll be even older and more demented. I think people are really getting tired of being scared and polarized. I really do. Yes, there will always be an evil element, but I genuinely believe that good will win out. I just wish it would hurry the fuck up.

      3. Lyn Avatar
        Lyn

        Don’t know why but suddenly your posts are going to my spam folder. One had a big red warning telling me that it contained a suspicious dangerous link I shouldn’t click on. To be safe I didn’t open the other two. Have you any idea why your link was flagged?

      4. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
        The View from a Drawbridge

        This is news to me. Which post? Which link? I’m sorry that happened! Please remove me from your spam list. It’s lonely in there…

      5. Lyn Avatar
        Lyn

        These three all had the same warnings. Your reply to comments on this post aren’t being diverted to spam and I’ve not changed any spam settings. It never specified which links were dangerous. Just said email contained a dangerous link. I think once one email gets flagged all new email from your site get marked with a warning. Don’t worry, your next posting, that gets sent to email jail, I’ll mark as not spam. Actually you had five other inmates in there keeping you company.

      6. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
        The View from a Drawbridge

        That’s really peculiar, because the only link in the email should have been the link to the posts, and at least in the “I Finally Get it, Ma” one, there are no links within the posts so it shouldn’t be referring to that. Can you hover over the link without clicking, and see if it’s showing up as the standard: https:// theviewfromadrawbridge .com/ 2024/mm/dd /blog-post-title/
        (I made the above generic and with spaces in between sections so it wouldn’t show up as a link here, but you get the idea.) Anyway, let me know. And I’ll ask someone else who is notified by email to see if they’re experiencing the same issue. Thanks, and so sorry for the inconvenience. I can’t imagine what is going on, but rest assured I’d never intentionally send you a virus!

      7. Lyn Avatar
        Lyn

        So far it has stopped sending you to spam with red warnings. I think my windows security was having trouble adjusting to being my main security. I’d been using McAfee, which was included in my internet service until they discontinued it, without warning me, at which point windows security took over. It took a minute for it to recognize you as legitimate and safe. When I called my internet service about their lack of notification, I got a technician who had to look up the fact that they’d discontinued their free McAfee. If they didn’t warn their tech’s, why would they warn their actual customers? At least my computer had a back up security suite installed or I probably would have been hacked, which is far worse than having a few emails mistakenly labeled as dangerous spam. I’ve had a computer frozen and invaded by hackers that McAfee missed. It was a stress filled nightmare that culminated in a fraud filing with Windows and having them kick the fraudsters off my computer and my internet service reimbursing all expenses incurred. To this day I feel a twinge of fear clicking on any links. Suffering with tech ptsd means not using the internet for anything that connects to my banking or legal information. Really limits the benefits of internet usage. At least the spam issue has been resolved. I marked you as not spam and they’re behaving for now.🙂

      8. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
        The View from a Drawbridge

        I have a friend who keeps texting me links without a comment, and I keep telling him I won’t click on a link unless I know it’s him, so he has to say something about it. But he still does it. I haven’t clicked on a link of his in years. He’s in his 80’s.
        I feel honored to be considered Not Spam. The stuff tastes terrible, and it’s very unhealthy. So, thanks!

      9. The View from a Drawbridge Avatar
        The View from a Drawbridge

        Also, I think there is a way to tell your computer that messages from my address are not spam, but I couldn’t tell you how that works.

Leave a Reply

Random Post

Buy my book on Amazon!

Join 641 other subscribers

498,634 hits so far!

Discover more from The View from a Drawbridge

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading