Today I drove through a part of the city that I hadn’t been to in years. 25 years ago I went there every day for work. So today I could almost see myself walking into my old office. And there was my old car in its parking space. And there I was, sitting at the picnic table where I used to eat lunch while reading a book.
It occurred to me that people leave an emotional signature behind them like an airplane leaves a contrail. I was so unhappy back then, so lonely. And I hated my job so much that the first thing I’d think every morning was, “I don’t want to go.” Driving through there brought it all back to me. I wish I could talk to that old me and tell her that things really would get better, that I wouldn’t always feel that hopeless and discounted and adrift.
This is why I get so angry when someone commits suicide. How can you know? Not only is it a selfish act that hurts everyone who is connected to you, but you’re depriving yourself of the potentiality of life. You have no way of knowing what the future will bring, who you will meet, what opportunities will present themselves to you.
Think of the person you were 20 years ago. Could that person have imagined where you are and who you are right now? Most likely not. And as far as I am concerned, that’s what gives me hope during the hard times, and adds to my excitement when things are going well. Life is one big surprise party. You may as well stick around. There just might be cake.
Image credit: http://www.simplythebestcoaching.com
Leave a Reply to The View from a DrawbridgeCancel reply