There Goes the Neighborhood

I’ve been house hunting, and I can tell, almost immediately, if I’d be a good fit for a neighborhood. If there are wide expanses of manicured lawns, I definitely will not fit in. And I would chafe under rules that dictated what color I paint my mailbox. I’m not a “keep up appearances” kind of…

I’ve been house hunting, and I can tell, almost immediately, if I’d be a good fit for a neighborhood. If there are wide expanses of manicured lawns, I definitely will not fit in. And I would chafe under rules that dictated what color I paint my mailbox. I’m not a “keep up appearances” kind of person, if I can possibly avoid it. I prefer a yard that’s pretty much au naturel, and my tastes can be unorthodox.

I love dandelions, because the bees love them. I don’t know why people object to moss or dollar weed. I mean, it’s green and it’s flat, right? What’s the big deal? Lawns were a French affectation that unfortunately caught on, and have been a nightmare for the environment ever since. I will not, absolutely will NOT fertilize my lawn. That crap gets into the watershed, and it’s one of the reasons that the river in Jacksonville gets choked with green slime every summer.

I like to plant flowers that will attract butterflies and bees and hummingbirds. I love to grow heirloom tomatoes, although I’m not great at it. I dream of having a bat house in my back yard. I think squirrels have as much right to food as any other creature. Possums keep the tick population under control. And if I feel like paining my house hot pink, I’ll do so (although it’s unlikely).

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not going to leave junk cars up on cinder blocks in the yard, or moldy couches that fill with mice and stink after a good rain. I’m not going to plant flowers in an abandoned toilet or cook meth (I hate to cook). But if you can’t handle a neighbor’s yard that suffers from benign neglect, or a neighbor who has an interesting concept of art, then we’re going to have issues.

Having said that, I am quiet, I don’t cause trouble, and the police have never been called to my door. I want to steal an idea from a friend and call my next home “Tranquility Base”. I’ll even hold onto your mail while you’re on vacation if you ask, call 911 if I see someone peeping in your windows, and help you look for your dog if he runs away. So I’d like to think I’m a good neighbor to have. I am house hunting in the Seattle area, so if you are looking to sell, please, please contact me first. More details here.

Urchfont Manor
Urchfont Manor. It’s safe to say I do not live here.

Like this blog? Then you’ll LOVE this book! http://amzn.to/2mlPVh5

6 responses to “There Goes the Neighborhood”

  1. You would have loved my grandmothers yard. When she moved in she did some planting and then let nature take it’s course. I never saw her spend time mowing, pruning or weeding but her garden and yard thrived. It was a magical, ethereal place you could actually believe had fairies and elves hiding among the tall grass or cool deep foliage. Every breath was filled with the uplifting aroma of lilac, wisteria, lily of the valley, violets, morning glories and flowers I never knew the names of. And visually it inspired such artistic creativity in me. You can’t get all that from a well manicured lawn.

    The right style or decorated toilet could make an attractive planter. 🙂

    1. Now you’re talking! And manicured lawns always scream “I’m stressed out and lack imagination” to me.

      1. Well I really hope you find a place to unleash your unique imagination on soon.

      2. It’s in the works now! More details when it’s definite!

  2. Fingers, toes, arms, legs and eyes crossed for you. 🙂

    1. Well, uncross the eyes. Wouldn’t want ’em to get stuck that way. 🙂

Leave a Reply


Join 639 other subscribers

495,772 hits so far!

Discover more from The View from a Drawbridge

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading