The View from a Drawbridge

The random musings of a bridgetender with entirely too much time on her hands.

Once, I met an employee who worked in another department, and learned she had just had a baby. I congratulated her, as one does. I barely knew her, and doubted I’d have the opportunity to know her better. We traveled in very different circles. This was a random encounter, and I sort of figured that was that.

Later that day, I received an e-mail from her entitled “baby pictures”. I thought that was sweet, that she wanted to show me her baby. So I clicked on the e-mail.

And I let out this shriek that I’m sure made all my coworkers jump out of their skins.

Because what she sent me was pictures of her in the process of giving birth. And by that I mean close ups of all her most hairy private places, with a gooey, bloody baby’s head trying to burst therefrom. It was like a scene from Alien. That image is imprinted on my brain, despite all efforts on my part to exorcise it. Why? Just… why?

Believe me when I tell you that this is a vision that I would never voluntarily see. At the very least it should have come with a warning label. I am not interested in gazing at the nexus of any mammal, clothed or unclothed if I’m honest, and certainly not when it’s in the midst of doing… that. And most especially when it’s someone I’ve only just met.

I mean, seriously, who sends pictures like that? Who takes pictures like that? “Yes, dear, that’s your mother, in the most pain she’s ever been in in her entire life, and look! There’s your mushy little head!”

Every once in a while, someone will do something that’s so wildly inappropriate that I’m rendered speechless. Do they just not care at all about societal norms, or do they enjoy the shock value? Are they completely detached from reality, or are they testing the waters to see what they can get away with? Who knows.

And no, I can’t remember what I said to that woman. I can’t even remember what most of her looks like. Sorry. I just had to vent.


Like the way my weird mind works? Then you’ll enjoy my book!

2 thoughts on “Wildly Inappropriate

  1. Angiportus Librarysaver says:

    Oh, same here.
    Didn’t get to see the childbirth movie usually shown (then) in middle school till I was in college due to various factors not my fault. “Well, before the hour is out I will finally have seen it…” It only increased my resolve not to be involved in any way, since seeing b&w photos at 13 or so. There were 24 of us in that class, and when the lights came back on only 12 were left. I went up to the teacher, a bubbly sort scarce older than me, and said, “Well, that was a bit interesting, it reminded me of gutting a fish.” She was as usual perched on the edge of her desk, and came this close to falling off…Of course I should have added that it’s a good thing movies don’t have smelltracks.
    Another thing that puzzles me is people who stop and gawk at accidents. Curiosity is normal but sometimes it is better kept in check, if only to not screw up traffic even more. You’d think adults would have it under control. For crying out loud, you see one bloody mess, you’ve seen ’em all.
    Full disclosure, I sometimes find myself looking when on the bus, just as I look at anything unusual, and as quickly remind myself this probably isn’t something I want to see, and look away.
    Well, I hope someone told that woman that a content warning would be appropriate.

    1. Gutting a fish. Yes, I can see the similarities. It’s exactly why I don’t gut fish. 🙂

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